11 Things That I'm Not So Thankful For

Yes, I have a lot to be eternally thankful for, but as a privileged American citizen with rights and opportunities that far exceed those of others, I think I’m allowed to complain about the things that I am not so thankful for. Let’s indulge. 

  1. Post Binge Guilt- I’m a human, am I not? Sometimes we binge four consecutive days in a row. I just wish I didn’t hate myself so much for it. So I’m not thankful for feeling disgusted with myself and what I’ve eaten over the last few days. 
  2. Work- I should be thankful that I have a job and I can make money to buy myself nice useless things on black Friday, but… do I really have to go, like, everyday?
  3. Citations- I got pulled over the day before Thanksgiving. I’m not thankful.
  4. My Lack of Self Control- I am currently loathing myself over all the food I’ve eaten. 
  5. My Perpetual Singlehood- It’s nice to be able to spend my Saturday nights inside, alone, no where to go, no one to spend them with, no one to talk to, no-one to snuggle with, no one to vent to, no one to connect with. It’s great. It’s really fantastic. 
  6. Debt- America, the land of opportunity. The only place in the world where you can acquire a fulsome amount of debt before you can legally drink. 
  7. The Obligatory “We Should Hangout Sometime” Conversations- Whenever I come home for Thanksgiving, I normally run into old high school acquaintances from time to time. I just wish that we didn’t end our conversations with broken promises of get togethers that we both know neither of us will make an effort to initiate. 
  8. The Cold- What’s that about? The seasons change, and just when I’m getting comfortable with the warm weather, all of a sudden it’s cold. And this happens every friggin year. 
  9. My High Expectations of Life- I can say with confidence that all the things I looked forward to in adulthood have been unexpectedly disappointing. I should’ve seen it coming, but I didn’t.
  10. Destitution- For once in my life, I don’t think this is too much to ask you, but for once in my life, I would love to buy lunch without having to declare bankruptcy every single time. 
  11. 2018- I should be thankful I’m around for another year but with another year comes 365 more opportunities to fuck up my life even more. 

“Previously published by Thought Catalog at www.thoughtcatalog.com.” 


Popular Posts